Toxic Circle“Some time ago, during adolescence, he was diagnosed with narcissistic personality disorder” he states, giving me the truth about my boss, what he is hiding.I shudder.The impact creaks in my bones, shoots my heart, is what I sensed when noticing his strange way of acting. In thread I remember so many of those moments when Silvain was that man feeling invincible and unique, acting indifferent and aberrant. Now everything makes more sense, the reason for his actions becomes clear, but it darkens the world I walk on. Nothing is good, every disorder is a huge problem and difficult to deal with.“I imagined it, this is something...” I can't find the right word.“Terrible, it's out of his hands and it has to do with his past, something I'm not going to delve into, it's not my business to tell you, he hasn't even told me everything, I'm sorry”“Forgive me, I have pressured you and I was not supposed to know this like this” I express sadly.“No, I feel like I should fill you in
Northern LightsThe only thing that is unmade in Silvain's room is the bed, for the first time I am there and I can't avoid studying; It is more spacious than her attic, the distinction and luxury predominate and I am left speechless. It is evident that his favorite color is gray, here there is no blue, but a white that accompanies it and black that exalts elegance, also that coldness penetrating deeply.The elements are imposed, highlighting the enormous bed with nightstands on the sides where glass lamps remain, a large unlit screen. It has a fireplace, a huge closet, a dream bathroom, I close the door; The curtains flap in the wind, and when I draw them I come across the glazed glass sliding doors that open onto a balcony. The height gives a beautiful panorama and the wind blows my hair; It's not like the one you can see from the terrace, but it catches you just the same.I hear noise in the room, that's why I suddenly return, there is no one, it was a trick in my head. I get to wo
Fucking SuperiorityBefore half past twelve, I go into the kitchen. It is a challenge to focus on a dish that is to your liking and that is not difficult to prepare. Everyone likes chicken, I don't think he is the exception. I remember Zinnia making it for her a few times at lunch, and I feel more confident about making it. Lucky me that I came across Zinnia's recipe book, how strange that I forgot it here. There are an infinite number of options, among which chicken stands out in various preparations."Orange chicken" it says there, listed as Silvain's favorite Asian dish.I inform myself by looking at the recipe and procedure several times. It seems like a piece of cake, since in action everything is a little complex, if not impossible. The pressure on you, the obligation for everything to be perfect, doesn't help. Mmmm, it smells good, I try it and find it just right.I keep the minutes in my mind, I confirm it on the screen of my phone. In fact, the exact time has passed when ever
The proposal"And he locks himself in a room so empty of reality, where the echo is silent and decay a weak company that leads him to eternal solitude."...I had a nightmare, a nonsense that went away when I opened my eyes. I surround the room with my orbs, from that angle I capture the reign of darkness. The blinds are open and I see various lights from other buildings. New York, "the city that never sleeps", that's why it fits like a glove.It's not as late as it seems, here it's barely ten at night, and in Los Angeles, three hours less. I'll call Mila, she hasn't contacted me, maybe she's forgotten, in any case I have reason to worry.“Mila”“Excuse me, everything is in order, I'm sorry for not letting you know as I promised. Still not sleeping?”“Yes, I woke up suddenly and decided to mark you, I'm glad everything is going well. I figured you forgot to tell me, don't worry”“It's just that I haven't seen my parents in weeks and yet I've gotten emotional, now I'm with dad in the h
"The music..." he mentions, a slower song casually begins to play, the couples are piling up, we are not the only ones. Let yourself go, everything will flow naturally...“You make it all look so easy”“And you keep seeing the impossibility, Aryanna” —he comments, I'm not angry, he's absolutely right.“I'm sorry I can not avoid it”“I know you can do it”Soon, the crash of his chest against mine begins, we move to the rhythm of a dance that is too slow and we look into each other's eyes. It overwhelms, we find ourselves in a bubble that does not break, it keeps seeing me so deep, causing a whirlpool in my stomach, difficulty moving, so I stop, it is impossible to continue, I can't take it anymore.“I'm sorry”“What's happening?” He gets restless, he studies my features, I will surely fail if I make excuses, he has that psychological spark that reads minds, gestures and my body language expresses the truth to him.Finally it leaves my waist, I can regain normality of my breathing.“I-I
DominantMy blood paralyzes, the vitality of the air is gone, a dense fog crushes my senses. I am no longer at the foot of the hill, I have already fallen before him: a predator. Which doesn't do good.Who cares knowing in defeat when sanity is gone?Soon, the ashes fly and the insects flutter on me. A bit of subtlety that I wouldn't employ exists.The emotion is already a mixture, the pernicious is an illicit substance that I hope will lead me to an overdose. The flame devours me. I no longer reside, I no longer exist.But this doesn't mean anything.Silvain can't give more.For now I forget my fears, I push reality away, I stay with this thing that makes me fly."The impact of the fall will hurt."...Anchored in the memory of less than three hours ago, I blink in the light darkness. My palm rests on his bare chest, part of my hair messy there, I try to separate myself but one of his arms goes through my waist. I give up, I don't want to wake him up. His chest rises and falls leisur
A War CryThe doubts have not been completely cleared up, Gaspar is right, I alone must decide. I still have these days to think about it. On Thursday when Mila returns I will also tell her about it, not in details, because she doesn't know anything about what Silvain does, nor does she know his aberrant way of being. Sigh, I go for that shower that my body is crying out for. And I'm already starting to look for what outfit to wear for tonight's outing. Assuring that it is only a friendly meeting, I have not been able to refuse his invitation. Just because it's not something serious, but to get away from the routine, doesn't mean I'm going to wear just any clothes.I want to be pretty, look good.The box of chocolates is still in the kitchen, closed and with the perfect bow undone. I dare to eat one of those expensive chocolates. In my mouth, the sweet melts, the delicious filling escapes in one bite. I still don't believe Silvain sent this to me....The night has fallen, as the fabr
The portraitThe afternoon is falling, the blue sky turning orange and pink is captivating. The idea of going to take a look around those parts grows immeasurably. Nobody sees me, why not do it? Sooner than I thought, I finished my work for the day, so I'm free, I'm still here with plenty of time, I have to keep to the schedule. I've already showered, I just have to wait for the clock to strike five. By the way, my cell phone is in the room. I advance on the well-kept grass, I decide to take off my shoes, it is pleasant to feel my feet sinking into the grass. Every so often I look around, afraid of being seen. I am already close to the wooded area, I enter amazed by the imminence of the trees."What am I doing?"Maybe I should go back, I don't want to, I'm still out there, knowing that I can get myself into trouble. Anyway, I can't stop now, I've walked for a few minutes and finally, before my eyes is that cabin that has that exterior appearance that evokes something completely countr